Not sure if this
is a blog, or a place for random thoughts, or are they one and the
same?
Let's just say that this page is for "Stuff to read about the ongoing work
on
Faoin Spéir".
Blog
11/11/2015:
Mary's Blog, plain sailing?
My whole life I
have had something to say. Ask anyone who knows me. In my life thus
far I have had struggles like everybody else but I have a pretty solid
network of friends
and family to whom I have talked and sought help
and worked out what is going on.
The prospect of living on board a
boat and travelling the world seemed like a
wonderful idea when
Leonard and I first talked about it. It appealed to my
unconventional side, the bit of me that seeks adventure and newness and
desire to
travel. I love people, I am excited at the prospect of
experiencing other cultures
firsthand, I want to open up my mind and
feel the freedom of living without frontiers.
However the
reality of living on the boat isn’t as grand as all that. Last week we spent
half term on Faoin Spéir on Bere Island where she is now berthed. There
were good
bits in the week. The Island is beautiful and we had
lovely walks. We had friends to stay
and that was fantastic, I loved
the chatting and sharing fun and food. We went for a sail
on
Thursday. That was pretty neat... But, we had storms and lots of rain and leaks
and
wet and very little space inside as we continue the renovation
and more storms and
rain and leaks and waking up with the rain
dripping on us. I was so sick to the teeth of it
all and Leonard was
all, “We have to have rain to see what is leaking, then we can
mend
it”. I have only one word for it... Drudgery. It was miserable and cold and wet
at the
end of October on the south west coast of Ireland.
9 for
lunch :-) The table works!
|
I came home
feeling, I
cannot do this. Boat life is
not for me. So I
feel a bit
shaken by the whole thing
not least because I
never
expected to feel like this.
And so the soul
searching
kicked in. This is not a
romantic notion this
is to
become the reality of my
life and the ongoing
question? Is this what I
really want? Now I know
there are probably people
out there going,” well it’s a
bit late for that love!” And I
think what the heck have I
been thinking? But here is


the truth. I have
been chatting and thinking and romanticising and planning but not doing
reality, I think. I really want to live on board, but it is time for me
to get practical.
I think up to now I have maintained silence about Faoin
Spéir and our desire to live on
board because Leonard has done all
the talking. He is perfectly comfortable with the
whole idea and he
is perfectly comfortable with technology. I also felt that there should
only be one voice and as I felt a little differently about some stuff
then it was best to say
nothing. Also to be honest until we put
Faoin Spéir in the water last August and sailed
her the whole live
aboard thing was all a bit pie in the sky and unreal. Now it is a
different story. Now we are eight months from becoming full time live
aboards and I feel
scared. I have felt fear before, I know it is
manageable and it doesn't last forever. But this
fear is very strong
and it has levels... Let me explain
Out
Walking on Bere Island.
|
I have some fears
about the fact that our boat is still a renovation project, we have the
basics and she is habitable in but it`s not home and I have no way to
control that. I
cannot plumb or do carpentry or wire and Leonard is
doing all he can. The boat is a
three hour drive from us now and we
don’t get to spend enough time on her. Our
deadline is next summer
that is not a movable feast. I am also feeling my size and
weight on the boat. I have always been obese and I manage it. I know
it`s not good for
me, people have been unkind about my size but I
have always been ok with it. Or at
least I have been ok enough not
to do anything about it! However on board our boat my
size makes me
less able bodied than everyone else so it is making my life
uncomfortable. I have to do something about it, my size and strength and
fitness or
living on board will be miserable for me. Now I can do
something about this, so my
own ‘operation transformation’ has
begun.